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"Don't Take It So Seriously"

 Examples:

Don’t take it so seriously, it’s no big deal.

Don’t take it so seriously, it’s only...

 Why This Is A Bad Thing To Say: Explanation

We can all benefit by not taking things so seriously, but what are the odds that saying this to someone is going to actually help them “lighten up”, or think more positively? Not much of a chance at all. The person DOES think it’s a serious situation, whether you think so or not. If you try to impose your view of a situation on someone else who has an emotional reaction, you put yourself in the situation of CONTRADICTING the person, albeit in a subtle way.

Telling someone to take something less seriously says: “You are wrong to think this is a serious situation”, even if that’s not what you mean to say. Remember, it’s not about your intentions, but about how the other person perceives your comment. 

Make It Better: More Effective Communication

If you want to help someone view something from a different, more positive perspective, don’t TELL them to do that. Help them to do it. Here are some examples you can try:

Let’s see what the worst case scenario is here, and whether it’s that serious.

Would you like to talk this through? Sometimes having a sounding board can help.

I can see that you think this is a serious situation.

About The Author

Robert's books have sold over 300 thousand copies worldwide, and have been translated into Chinese, French, German and Japanese.

He holds a Masters Degree in Applied Psychology, and has taught clinical and counselling psychology at the college level.

You can browse his Amazon Author page by clicking the graphic above.

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JLo signing Imperfect Phrases For Better Relationships by Robert Bacal

Just Jenny from the block signing at the International Conference: Shut Your Trap, Listen, And Have The Relationship You Want

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